The name Becoming You came from a change that began in me when I became a mother.

During pregnancy, I often wondered what kind of person my child would become. Like many parents, I imagined her growing up to be intelligent, kind and courageous. Without realizing it, I was already creating a picture of the person I hoped she would be.

When My Greatest Wish Changed

But as the day of her birth drew closer, all those expectations became much simpler. More than anything else, I wanted her to be healthy and safe.

That change made me begin to question what children truly need from us—not a carefully planned future, but the love, security and freedom to discover who they already are.

The Question That Changed My Perspective

Later, during a parenting class, our teacher asked us a simple question: “What kind of person do you hope your child will become?”

The answers were familiar. We hoped our children would be intelligent, kind, brave and well behaved. Some imagined them becoming doctors, lawyers or achieving the dreams that we ourselves had not fulfilled.

Then the teacher paused and shared a sentence that has stayed with me ever since:

“Your child will not become the person you want them to be. They will become the person you are.”

In that moment, I began to understand that children learn far more from who we are and how we live than from the future we try to plan for them.

Our Role Is Not to Shape Them

As parents, we may believe that guiding a child means showing them exactly who they should become. Without realizing it, we can place our own expectations, unfinished dreams and ideas of success upon them.

But every child arrives with their own rhythm, interests, personality and story. Our responsibility is not to reshape these qualities, but to notice, understand and protect them.

We can create a home filled with love, safety and respect—a place where children feel free to know themselves, trust themselves and grow with confidence.

A child does not need to become our idea of them. They need the freedom to become themselves.

Why Becoming You

Not Becoming Me. Not Becoming What I Want You to Be.

The name is a reminder that every child deserves the freedom to grow into their own unique self. As parents, we are there to walk beside them—to offer love, encouragement and a safe place from which they can explore the world.

Becoming You preserves more than milestones and photographs. It holds the story of a child gradually discovering who they are, surrounded by the people who loved them from the very beginning.

May every child grow in love, believe in who they are and have the courage to become truly themselves.

This is the hope at the heart of the book: that one day, when children look back through its pages, they will see not only how much they have grown, but how deeply they were loved for being exactly who they are.